She says it again to herself as if she might be able to take it more seriously this time around - and it turns over again.
It does nothing for records to her sanity, no doubt, but she begins to laugh. Laugh and laugh and laugh. Thick as gun smoke, loud as canons. It goes and goes and goes. Until the mirth is twisted from ugly to joyous than back again. Shall she recolour her anger for him? Would that meet his standards?
He is no better than Hastings, she realises. Perhaps not in cruelty - she will give Elena at least that much. If nothing else, he is too self involved to manage half of what Hasting's did. But the selfish killing for his own amusement, that seemed perfectly to what he was capable of, given how quickly he seem inclined to violence. But the arrogance, the playing this off like it was just a matter of her suppressing their right to happiness, Sam's accusation - you're prejudiced. Like she woke up like this. ]
(And what of the families, the homes, that you no doubt have destroyed? How long shall they grieve their loses - ) [ light, mocking, arrogantly parroting his own words back at him. ] ( - five, ten years maybe? Will that be enough to return fathers, daughters, wives, dear friends? When you will glory in your new love with Elena for a possible eternity. Their time is brief, lonely, and what little mirth life for those so briefly alive, has been snatched from them. )
( it doesn't matter what he says. damon knows that, and still he wants her to berate her about just how stupid she's being, but... it won't do any good. the only thing that might is forcing her around elena more, forcing her to see that not all vampires are the monsters she's so convinced they are. he is, certainly, but he's not concerned about her opinion of him — he's more than confident in his ability to fend for himself — but elena doesn't need this.
coolly, ever playing the level-headed superior, damon retreats from their connection, leaving only one sliver of a thread left between them.
An interesting way to talk to someone you need so much, buttercup.
he doesn't have to help her. he got what he wanted, after all. )
(Going back on our deal already? I kept my end of the deal. I will be sure to inform the Commander if you do not keep yours. It is her that said I ought to ask you. )
[ Her eyes roll - like he is acting just like she expected. She feigns neither levelheadedness nor softens her tone. She was ever poor at acting like other than what she is, stubborn and clawing all the way down. ]
(You noble types are always so concerned with your word and being honourable... Right up until you're not and you don't give a shit. At least I'm honest.
that's about all that can be said in damon's favour: he's honest, perhaps to a fault, and he makes no attempts to hide who or what he is. in all things he wants what is real, and if lakshmi really hates him... boohoo for her.
still, he hasn't confirmed or denied whether he's backing out of the deal, and the mention of shepard sparks amusement. shepard sent her here, huh? he'll have to get her a fruit basket.
Remind me why I should care about that? Shepard's not my keeper.)
(Who else would I be beholden to? Cathaway? Prince? The fucking president?
what kind of stupid question...
I'm not beholden to anyone. My choices are mine and they stand on their own.
which is not to say that there aren't people whose opinions he cares about — there's sam and elena and stefan, just to name people who are here or have been here — but the idea that anyone chooses his course but him, anyone can influence him when he doesn't want to be influenced... please, lakshmi. don't be ridiculous. )
❰ damon is suddenly and completely very, very tired. he's done with vitriol and being purposefully misunderstood and reviled for things he never even said or did or even intended. if lakshmi hated him for him that would be one thing. he is a uniquely terrible person, and he has done more than enough to be hated for. but expectations, preconceptions he has nothing to do with? no. he won't allow anyone to look at him and see something else.
I didn't argue anything. I told you what I think and I don't care if you approve. Live your life according to the whims of people who are neither alive nor here, I don't give a fuck. But if you want my help, you will show me some respect.
as with his demand for her apology, there is nothing of a request in this. she will do this, or she will get nothing from him.❱
❰ Which of us started this bullshit, hm? Which of us was the one in the nest for two seconds before they started trying to murder people?
damon lets that question settle for a moment before he starts again, calmer this time.
Do the math, Lakshmi, I was here for months before you were. No one died. No one was injured who didn't injure me first or literally ask for it. Meanwhile you're here for two weeks and all of a sudden it's war with lines drawn and shots fired. I am not the monster here. I am not the one tearing the nest apart.
I'll show you respect when you earn it, buttercup. And you can start by not being a dick because I dare not to fall at your preciously superior human feet. ❱
( Then have a care for where I have been, Damon Salvatore, because it has been a war for centuries. The sorrow I have seen is not undone by a few weeks of good merit. But I swore to your Sam my hand will be stayed. I have kept my word since the first day. )
[ but she can and she will, openly as she is wont, resent their presence. The source of her argument with Sam, she will stay her hand, she will not kill them, but she will never betray the suffering of her own body and of her own people, but playing house with them. ]
(Come if you feel like having a use. If our merit is our good and bad actions for the sake of the hive, then I only care about the ones that get us through this mission. If there is no respect between us for that, then we all are already dead. )
❰ Oh, shit, man, you're so right. You haven't tried to kill my friend in two weeks, that makes everything perfectly fucking fine, doesn't it? Don't act like you have more reason to hate me than I do you, you don't know me. I've never been to fucking India, I don't know where the fuck Jhansi even is. If you're going to hate me, hate me. I won't be a stand-in for your issues, I'm plenty shitty on my own without your sob story pinned on my goddamn back.
after a moment —
And don't exaggerate, neither of us has even been alive for centuries, plural. This isn't war, even if you want to make it one. You're just a traumatized girl trying to make yourself feel better about your fucked up bullshit by making it bigger than you. You're not special. ❱
because yeah this is not the end of their fighting by a long shot, and they both know it. but damon has had it up to the gills with holier than thou queens for the evening, so. #bye bitch, the mental link is closed and it's not opening back up. ❱
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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She says it again to herself as if she might be able to take it more seriously this time around - and it turns over again.
It does nothing for records to her sanity, no doubt, but she begins to laugh. Laugh and laugh and laugh. Thick as gun smoke, loud as canons. It goes and goes and goes. Until the mirth is twisted from ugly to joyous than back again. Shall she recolour her anger for him? Would that meet his standards?
He is no better than Hastings, she realises. Perhaps not in cruelty - she will give Elena at least that much. If nothing else, he is too self involved to manage half of what Hasting's did. But the selfish killing for his own amusement, that seemed perfectly to what he was capable of, given how quickly he seem inclined to violence. But the arrogance, the playing this off like it was just a matter of her suppressing their right to happiness, Sam's accusation - you're prejudiced. Like she woke up like this. ]
( And what of the families, the homes, that you no doubt have destroyed? How long shall they grieve their loses - ) [ light, mocking, arrogantly parroting his own words back at him. ] ( - five, ten years maybe? Will that be enough to return fathers, daughters, wives, dear friends? When you will glory in your new love with Elena for a possible eternity. Their time is brief, lonely, and what little mirth life for those so briefly alive, has been snatched from them. )
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coolly, ever playing the level-headed superior, damon retreats from their connection, leaving only one sliver of a thread left between them.
An interesting way to talk to someone you need so much, buttercup.
he doesn't have to help her. he got what he wanted, after all. )
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[ Her eyes roll - like he is acting just like she expected. She feigns neither levelheadedness nor softens her tone. She was ever poor at acting like other than what she is, stubborn and clawing all the way down. ]
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that's about all that can be said in damon's favour: he's honest, perhaps to a fault, and he makes no attempts to hide who or what he is. in all things he wants what is real, and if lakshmi really hates him... boohoo for her.
still, he hasn't confirmed or denied whether he's backing out of the deal, and the mention of shepard sparks amusement. shepard sent her here, huh? he'll have to get her a fruit basket.
Remind me why I should care about that? Shepard's not my keeper. )
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[ Erg. ]
( Because you must be beholden to someone else aside from your beloved. Otherwise you really aren't to be trusted. )
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what kind of stupid question...
I'm not beholden to anyone. My choices are mine and they stand on their own.
which is not to say that there aren't people whose opinions he cares about — there's sam and elena and stefan, just to name people who are here or have been here — but the idea that anyone chooses his course but him, anyone can influence him when he doesn't want to be influenced... please, lakshmi. don't be ridiculous. )
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(A child squalling makes those arguments. Whatever delusions you hold about yourself aren't my concern. Will you be assisting or not? )
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I didn't argue anything. I told you what I think and I don't care if you approve. Live your life according to the whims of people who are neither alive nor here, I don't give a fuck. But if you want my help, you will show me some respect.
as with his demand for her apology, there is nothing of a request in this. she will do this, or she will get nothing from him.❱
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damon lets that question settle for a moment before he starts again, calmer this time.
Do the math, Lakshmi, I was here for months before you were. No one died. No one was injured who didn't injure me first or literally ask for it. Meanwhile you're here for two weeks and all of a sudden it's war with lines drawn and shots fired. I am not the monster here. I am not the one tearing the nest apart.
I'll show you respect when you earn it, buttercup. And you can start by not being a dick because I dare not to fall at your preciously superior human feet. ❱
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[ but she can and she will, openly as she is wont, resent their presence. The source of her argument with Sam, she will stay her hand, she will not kill them, but she will never betray the suffering of her own body and of her own people, but playing house with them. ]
(Come if you feel like having a use. If our merit is our good and bad actions for the sake of the hive, then I only care about the ones that get us through this mission. If there is no respect between us for that, then we all are already dead. )
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after a moment —
And don't exaggerate, neither of us has even been alive for centuries, plural. This isn't war, even if you want to make it one. You're just a traumatized girl trying to make yourself feel better about your fucked up bullshit by making it bigger than you. You're not special. ❱
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Are you finished? )
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because yeah this is not the end of their fighting by a long shot, and they both know it. but damon has had it up to the gills with holier than thou queens for the evening, so. #bye bitch, the mental link is closed and it's not opening back up. ❱